Family Matters (short version)

FAMILY MATTERS 

Reviving the family is essential to society's future 

by Les Govment 

41 views

If you are middle-aged or older, you’ve probably noticed that the traditional, biological family isn’t as tenacious as it was in the past. Certainly, there still are good, tight-knit families in America. But families in general aren't as cohesive as families used to be. 

The decline of the traditional family spans several decades, and a variety of things-- including personal, cultural, and political culprits-- have contributed to that downward slide. However, I’m not going to go into detail here about the causes of the decline of the family. For now, it’s sufficient to say that the sexual revolution and some elements of the feminist movement certainly played roles in weakening the family. 

We can see the disheartening evidence of the weakened condition of many families throughout our society: a high number of one-parent households, domestic violence, absent parents, cross-dressing children, cyber-bullying, flash-mobs of teenagers robbing stores, rioting and looting, college kids who can't handle hearing opposing views, ad nauseam. 

We are on a path to becoming a dysfunctional society.

Every Child Deserves a Good Mother and Father 

It’s well established that the best social structure to raise a child in is the traditional, biological family. Therein, a child can experience the benefits of having both a father and a mother, and all that they can provide: sustenance, love, guidance, protection. It’s also beneficial for a child to have siblings, which gives a child a chance to experience peer relationships with adult supervision. Inevitably, such families will have conflicts within them, but life in a good family will provide experiences for a child that cultivate things like affection and respect for others, self-discipline, a sense of self-worth, and a good work ethic. 

Unfortunately, too many children in America are missing out on the advantages of being raised in a good family. Child abuse and spouse abuse are problems that exist in too many households. Another problem is inadequate moral guidance from parents-- and it's a problem that is rather widespread, too (hint: public schools and day-care centers can't be depended on to supplement or take the place of parental guidance). Also, there has been a huge increase in the number of one-parent households. In 1960, only about 10% of all children under 18 years of age in the U.S. were being raised in one-parent households. By 2016, that number had increased to about 30%-- over 22 million kids. 

One-parent households come about through a variety of ways. 

Some one-parent households come to be through the misfortune of one parent passing away prematurely or getting killed in an accident-- which leaves the widowed spouse stuck with being a single parent (and faultless in that, of course). 

Another way that one-parent households come to be is through births outside of marriage-- there are well over a million babies born annually in the U.S. to single females. (Obviously, males are involved in conceiving those babies. While some single males do take on their responsibilities toward the mother and child, all too many do not. It’s also reasonable to place some of the blame for the high out-of-wedlock birthrate on government hand-out programs, which can create an extra incentive for unattached females of low income to have babies and thus become eligible for, or get an increase in, government assistance.)

A third way that one-parent households come about is through divorce. 

I’m not going to throw a blanket of condemnation over everyone who has been divorced. Obviously, it’s perfectly legitimate to get divorced when one is in a situation where there is ongoing spouse abuse or child abuse. Sexual infidelity on the part of one’s spouse can also be grounds for divorce. And there might be other unique circumstances under which divorce can be justified. But the high divorce rate in the U.S. serves as evidence that marriage hasn’t been taken seriously enough by many Americans. 

The problems that prompt people to consider divorce are varied. Some couples might find that they’re poorly matched-- possibly the result of marrying in haste. In other cases, personality conflicts can develop over time within marriage. Other couples might quarrel a lot about money matters. And I’m sure there are plenty of other reasons why couples consider divorce. But when children are involved, a couple should try to save their marriage, because getting divorced will likely have a negative effect on their kids-- particularly in cases where the children have lived with both parents for several years.

I’ve raised the issue of single parenting mainly to stress that a single parent’s best efforts usually can’t equal the best efforts of a mother-and-father couple. Nearly one out of three kids live in one-parent households, so there is a need to discourage out-of-wedlock pregnancy (primarily by fostering sexual abstinence among teens and young single adults), and a need to promote lifelong commitment in marriage. 

I don’t endorse government intervention to accomplish those goals; I choose persuasion instead. 

Our ability to reproduce carries with it vast responsibilities; therefore, the reproductive act should be treated in kind and marital commitment should be taken seriously. So, I encourage people to rediscover the value of sexual abstinence outside of a marital commitment. I urge single females to shun the trend of getting pregnant and having babies outside of marriage (but I don't support abortion toward that end). I encourage those who are married to exercise the necessary practice of compromise, and the worthy trait of forgiveness. I urge couples to try to solve the problems that come up along the way, instead of walking out on each other.

Conclusion: Better Families Needed 

The human race consists of two sexes, each sex having its own set of nature-based, gendered traits. (Note: only a miniscule percentage of people are born with a biologically-based intersexual condition). Adhering to the natural method, it takes one male and one female to conceive a child. Love, commitment and the sexual bond-- combined with good morals-- are basic ingredients of a good marriage. In turn, a good marriage is the cornerstone that’s needed to build and maintain a good, cohesive, traditional family-- ultimately contributing to a better society. 

Our country is currently in a decades-long, family-eroding cultural decline that bears the fingerprints of some badly bent liberal thinking in a variety of places-- particularly in education and entertainment. Those of us who know the value of having a good mother and father should do what we can to make the traditional family a stronger and more revered part of American culture again-- not by pursuing a litany of government mandates, but through moral resolve, example and persuasion. //

...